I have a friend who recently confessed she has an autoimmune disorder. She hesitated to reveal this to people as she makes a career of helping people heal and improve their diets and has been a shining example of what living the Almost Vegan life will do for you. However, she bravely chose to reveal this in hopes that people would realize that her diet actually prevented her from subcumming to this disease earlier. You can read Amber's story HERE.
I can completely relate to this, as recently my health took a downturn, and I too, promote healthy living as a way to heal. However, as I've said many times, healing is physical, emotional and spiritual, and without balancing all three, illness will creep it's way in. Eating healthy and getting exercise is fantastic and will no doubt keep you healthy for a long time. Eventually though, if the underlying issues that caused you to be unhealhty in the first place are not addressed, at some point you will experience health issues again.
Therefore, I have decided to create a series of posts on the emotional and spiritual tools for getting healthy. This is where I'm at in my journey right now as well. I've been great at eating right, but when it comes to the other stuff it's been a challenge for me. I'll be discussing:
Fun card from my friend Jocelyn, my friends have been WONDERFUL!!
I've been home, and when I say home, I mean my Mom's house, from the hospital for almost two weeks now. It's been an interesting transition because a) I'm not in my own home b) I haven't lived with another person in a decade c) It's been longer than that since I've lived with my Mom d) We've had Home Health Care people (nurses, physical therapist, occupational therapist, etc) in and out all week e) and my biggest accomplishment was I learned how to shower myself again (which I'm proud of).
My book stash
All in all, stressful, but BRILLIANT at the same time. Today is my 31st birthday and I'm so grateful for all the lessons I've learned this past year. I've been in the hospital three times; I spent the best weekend of my life at Kripalu with my mentor Gabrielle Bernstein and met my Spirit Junkie Sisters, who have supported me all the way. I also had the worst vacation of my life with my Spring trip to Oregon; dropped out of a Vipassana meditation retreat, got rained on at the beach, and lost in Portland. Visited the Harry Potter theme park, yipee! I suddenly have a new family; soon to be step Mom, 5 grown "brothers and sisters" and 2 young ones, and numerous uncles, aunts, etc. My Dad is happier than I've ever seen him. My cancer is dissolving and recent events provided me with a new Soul Sister. Overall, I am grateful and looking forward to homemade manicotti and some delicious chocolate cake concoction from Eden Alley. I also hope to venture out once or twice this weekend; one to spent a lovey Sunday afternoon at a local ice cream parlour, Murray's with my new family.
Delicious green smoothie, I call it the Kindness Smoothie (spinach, mint, cacao nibs, bee pollen, honey, banana, and a probiotic)
Having my Mom as a caretaker, I have a pretty dedicated health plan, which already is working. My blood pressure, which has been low for several months, is now normal. I can already do many things for myself that shock the physical/occupational therapists. One of the things on my list, CoQ10 has a testimonial from a guy who had an infraction rate (it's how much blood your heart is pumping through your veins) of 22% (mine is 20% and normal is 55-75%) and in six months went up to 50%! There are also similar stories of people doing this with something call Limu Juice, which has a special seaweed. In orange juice, it's not bad. I'm doing both, plus Hawthorn Berry for my heart.
Written in a card by one of my Spirit Junkie Sisters
We've also started QiGong exercises, a Chinese technique that moves the Chi and has healed millions for the last thousand years or so. Very simple, slow exercises. I also have arm exercises to build up my strength and muscle and will be starting a simple yoga in the next week. I am also doing a healing technique called the Healing codes, which is similar to EFT in some ways, but more about shifting energy. I do it in combination to the Violet Flame, a healing prayer/meditation.
I'm excited to be healing, and look forward to having a fantastic birthday, and incredible summer at Kripalu. I also have done some writing, and have three pieces coming out in three different publications over the next month!! I will post more details when I have them.
This past week I've been going through old files on my computer and deleting/updating/organizing them to clear some space on my computer. Last year I took Reiki I and II, which you can read about in my post I'm A Reiki Gal Now. Anyway, during one of the meditations, I had this incredible experience where all my animal spirit guide came to visit me one by one. After the meditation I quickly wrote down who I saw, and later looked up what each animal represents. I had save the info, and found it here recently, thought I'd share. Do you know who your Spirit Guides are?
Cat (general)
-- The Great Teacher of Magic and Mystery; the
cat lives totally in the moment with a deep psychic and spiritual awareness.
Independent and unpredictable, agile of body and mind, a free thinker that
meets challenges by perceiving the unseen. (One cannot own a cat; the cat will
give and receive love only on its own terms) At home in the dark of the night it is a valuable ally when encountering
the supernatural and facing your primal fears. As the cat’s energy field
flows opposite that of humans it has the healing ability to neutralize your
negative energies.(The healing energy
cannot be taken from the cat, it is only given as a gift.) The cat teaches that the physical and spiritual worlds are not separate,
but one. In ancient Egypt
cats stood guard at the temple gates and throughout history cats have been seen
as the protectors of the pathways to the sacred mysteries. (The Egyptian
goddess'Bastet'takes the form
of a cat. The Norse goddess 'Freyja' rides a
chariot pulled by two cats)Note the colors and characteristics of your cat for that shall be
mirrored in your life and will help you to understand the mysteries that
your cat will reveal.(The cat's
karmic sacrifice is being the victim of “kick the cat".)Cat Spirit often brings the warning of being the recipient
of misdirected anger.
Horse
-- Symbol of freedom and of the wind. No other animal has given Man
the freedom of mobility like the horse. The horse gives the promise of
speed and adventure. The horse is the symbol of true power and this power
should not be used in a negative manner. Powerful and rebellious,
hot blooded and hot headed, horse spirit has power within that is sometimes
hard to control. Needing love and intimacy yet also feeling trapped by
it. Leaving home early yet having a hard time belonging elsewhere. Very
self-interested yet its work benefits others. The horse shows many
contradictions in character.
Rabbit -- Receiving hidden teachings and intuitive messages. Active around
dawn and dusk,(the time
of the fairies and fauns), they are guides into
the mystical shadow world. (Rabbit is interpreted in different
waysin different cultures. In China, it is
one of the astrological animals and linked to good fortune and the moon. To the
Mayans, Rabbit was the scribe who kept the lunar calendar. In Native American
tradition, Rabbit is known as the "Fear Caller", due to it projecting
its fear of those wishing to eat it, and thereby attracting the predators it
fears.) Rabbit is known for its ability to procreate and fearful thoughts
will procreate (manifest) into what you fear. Movement by leaps,
living by one’s own wits, not getting boxed into a corner. Take advantage
of opportunities that may present themselves only for a brief moment.Examine the foods you eat and perhaps eat more of a vegetarian diet. (The Rabbit is
a spirit animal that is extremely open to one on one communication and when
approached as an equal it will show great wisdom and guidance.)
Dolphin --[Do not confuse with the 'Porpoise'] --Inner sounds that can create outer manifestations. Living in tune
with the patterns and rhythm of nature. Using the power of breathing as an
emotional release of anger and pain. Swimming freely and going along
with your feelings, [Contrary to its popular "Flipper" image, the
dolphin can be aggressive and violent. Out of 48 harbor porpoises stranded on
the Welsh coast in 2004, 28 animals were found to have died from attacks
by bottlenose dolphins.]
Snake (general)-- Universal symbol of the exploration of the mysteries of life.
Because the snake represents the unveiling of the sacred mysteries many
repressive belief systems have linked snake to evil ideas.(The legend of
St. Patrick driving the snakes out of Ireland is one example of these
repressive systems using the snake as symbol of evil that had to be
eradicated.)The snake is a
totem which appears as protection from religious persecution. Throughout
history the snake has been the subject of legends linking it to creation,
fertility, transformation and sexuality. The snake is fire medicine, the
medicine of transmutation and it is the symbol of transformation and healing.(The image of
the snake is found on the "Caduceus",the symbol of
medicine.)The snake must shed its old skin in order to survive, symbolizing
death and rebirth.(The image of a snake
swallowing its own tail is a symbol of eternity)The shedding of the skin is also associated with astral travel and out of
body experiences, thus in shedding your skin, the snake symbolically
guides you along the path of transformation.Which is the
true meaning of the meeting of the snake withEve in the Garden of Eden*. Once she
had eaten the fruit from theTree of Knowledge, Eve then
transmuted the energy of wisdom in a symbolic shedding of her old skin, thus
her newly discovered "nakedness". {*Some
"Eden" scholars suggest that the snake depicted in the story was
actually 'Lilith' , the first
wife of Adam, who had rejected the domination of Adam and left Eden, but
returned to awaken Eve to the power within her.}The snake is cosmic consciousness, the ability to experience all things
without resistance, and the knowledge that all things are equal in creation. It
signals a great transition in life through new opportunities and changes.
Native American Totem Animal for "Scorpio"
Caterpillar -- Must evolve before assuming adulthood, shedding the old life
to accept a new one, the spinner of the metamorphic thread. The
Spirit Keeper of the Sacred Smoke and guardian of the tobacco plant.
Butterfly -- The
coming of adulthood, transformation, the rebirth of the soul, too often a need
to be noticed and stand out in a crowd. Symbol of Psyche, the
Greek Goddess of the Soul. Life is short, enjoy the journey. Fleeting moments.
Transformation. Internal and external change
The caterpillar
develops into the butterfly through a process called metamorphosis. It
comes from the Greek words, "meta", meaning beyond, and
"morph", meaning form; to signify transformation or change in
shape. Metamorphosis is a key element in Greek mythology. This ability to
change shape or form is a major development in the stories of Arachne,
Zeus, and Daphne. Almost all of the gods had the power of metamorphosis.
Christians use the term “born again” to define the process. The spiritual symbolism
of metamorphosis is quite obvious and easy to grasp. What is more
difficult to grasp, in terms of the animal spirit meaning, is the emphasis
on which stage you examine. The wonder of the end result as seen in
the butterfly is the one most focused upon, but the true essence of
the transformation lies within the cocoon of the transforming
caterpillar. It is far too easy to be enchanted by the beauty of the
butterfly and to ignore the lowly caterpillar. The true call to
spiritual metamorphosis comes from the appearance of the caterpillar as
spirit animal and the appearance of the butterfly as spirit animal is
often a warning not to become seduced by the apparent beauty of
the changes into forgetting the reason for undergoing the transformation.
The attainment of the metamorphosis is not for the appearances
of the physical world, but for the transubstantiation of the spiritual.
If, after you have undergone a seeming transformation, the
butterfly should appear as an animal messenger, it may be that you
missed the true meaning and purpose of the experience.
Pegasus (The Winged Horse) -- Pegasus comes to us from Greek mythology. He
was born of the blood of Medusa as she was beheaded by the hero Perseus.
Pegasus was concerned with sacred places and guarding them. He is the inspirer
of rising above difficulties and teaches the importance of having quick and
agile wisdom, as well as humility and knowing one's boundaries. In modern
times, Pegasus is seen as the symbol for the immortality of the soul, and as
the carrier and protector that guards the spirit in its journeys into the
astral plane. Pegasus is the power of the creative spirit in all of us. Pegasus
is the horse of the Muses and in the service of poets. He is the symbol of
inspiration, and of the beauty we bring to our life and the lives of others.
Pegasus, calls you to create, in music, in poetry, in writing, in art and to
share your expressions of beauty.
Unicorn -- The ability to negate the effects of venom and poisons,
the magick to make dreams become reality, connection to the spirits
of the forest with its fauns and fairies. The magick of the unicorn can
effect the weather. ( see:Whale/Narhwhal) The legend of Zeus and the "horn of plenty" may be the origin of the myth of the Unicorn.
Fox -- The Fox is seen as a sacred animal throughout the world. The fox is the cunning and stealthy
messenger of the gods and the magical guide to the world between time and space
often shape shifting on the journey,(sometimes into human form). The fox
lives in the "In-between Time" on the edge of dusk and dawn and can
guide the way into the Spiritual Realm. There are many species
of fox, but they all share the cleverness and cunning from which comes the
expression, "sly as a fox." For the fox learning to be
invisible is an important skill in life. The fox shows how to develop the
arts of camouflage, invisibility, and shape shifting. The fox teaches how
to be unpredictable by mastering the ability of blending unseen into the
surroundings. A creature of the night it is imbued with supernatural
powers and is a totem of healing of body, mind and spirit.
Owl -- The owl is ruler of the night and seer
of souls. The owl is honored as the keeper of spirits who had passed from one
plane to another. Often myth indicates the owl accompanying a spirit to the
underworld; winging it's newly freed soul from the physical world into the
realm of spirit. Bringer of wisdom, revealer of secrets and omens, intuition
and clairvoyance. Brings clarity and illumination to dreams, (Moon
magick). The “night eagle”, seeing and hearing that which others cannot.
Be aware of omens and portents for the owl brings the power to extract secrets
from out of the darkness. Native American Totem Animal for
"Sagittarius".('Lilith',who was the first
wife of Adam in the Garden of Eden and in Christian lore was said to be
the first witch, is often depicted as appearing in the form of a screech
owl or with screech owls as familiars. The owl is also the familiar of goddess'Athena')
After some initial rebellion and internal struggle with some of the food changes, I think I'm finally settled. Green Smoothies help tremendously. I've noticed I rarely crave sugar, and if I do I have a nice pulpy glass of orange juice. I did purchase some low sugar chocolate snacks, but haven't really needed them yet. Yesterday I went to Whole Foods and saw my favorite pimento cheese and I just stood there for two minutes, then walked on. I barely glanced at the Bothhouse farm drinks (I like the Mocha Cappuccino) and for the most part managed to make some really good shopping choices.
Coconut Based chocolate ice cream, cacao nibs and macadamia nuts, raw almonds dehydrated and seasoned with vanilla and maple, coconut ice cream bars, vegan/gluten free dark chocolate and orange bar and raw chocolate bar with superfoods. All very low sugar options and great for chocolate cravings.
So good, I'm addicted
LOVE this cereal! Reminds me of Grape Nuts without the crap
I started coffee enemas this week, and have done my meditations while holding the enema. You do a fresh water enema first, releasing immediately, then follow up with the coffee enema, which the goal is to hold for 15 minutes. So far I've gone anywhere from, not going to happen, to about 12 minutes so far. I think it gets easier the more you do it. Here's a great video from Jess the Wellness Warrior on doing coffee enemas:
I'm starting to see some results. I had major fatigue issues through October, and as the week has gone on I've had more and more energy. In fact, yesterday was the first time I didn't nap in who knows when. Not only did I not nap, I tried to go to bed, and ended up laying awake for an hour and getting back up! I still went to bed at a decent time, and got about 8.5 hours of sleep, which usually I sleep for about 12 hours, but I haven't need to. In fact I've had problems with boredom now that I'm not sleeping as much. Suddenly, I have all this time and I have no idea what to do with it. I cleaned off my two tables filled with mail and sorted through. I organized my bills and created a payment plan. I've watched some Hallmark Christmas movies and done some things around the house. I need to make a list of activities. It occurred to me that I could do that puzzle from my 31 Things list, finish putting together the photo album, also from that list. Shoot, I could actually start writing! My brain was too foggy, but it's clearing up so now it the time. Also, exercise and emotional/spiritual exercises. So we'll see how it goes.
Green Smoothie
Vegan Protein Powder
Oatmeal with raisins, cinnamon and a dash of almond milk
Right now one of my biggest projects is finding the right supplement balance. I REALLY hate that Cellect, the mineral/vitamin powder that has like 97 things in it. It's nasty, smells nasty, and just doesn't go away. There really isn't anything else like it though; however, I believe I found an herbal remedy (that I already have some of) called Merlin's Herbal Magic Root Elixir. It has over 30 herbs in it. I will still need to take all my alphabet vitamins (A, B6, B12, B17, D3, E), and Iron. There is also something called Colustrum that is in the Cellect and a great part of it that I can get on it's own. Plus I can start doing MSM again, Bee Pollen, and look into some other things. Some of the stuff is in pill form, but several things can be tossed into my smoothies.
So what's up for week two? Adding in exercising, which will be bouncing on the rebounder. Also, dry skin brushing and I really need to do the neti pot. I plan on thawing out the pesto I made this summer and making a delicious pesto pasta with Quinoa noodles, another soup, either corn chowder or baked potato, and trying out a Creamy Coconut Beans and Rice recipe. And of course, more green smoothies. I'll leave you with a photo of tonight's Buddha Bowl. This one has brown rice, diced potatoes, orange bell pepper, green beans, and seasoned tofu. Bowls are very easy to make. Pretty much use rice as your base, then any kind of veggie you could possibly think of, toss them together, and there you go. Delicious.
Cleansing week is starting out just so so right now. I have definitely not been perfect in the food department, or starting enemas, exercising or most of what the cleanse entails. However, I have been good about having at least one quart of green smoothie each day. And really, I have mostly been good about food, but I did have some leftovers (pasta and such) that I didn't want to waste that I ate. I made a White Bean chili that turned out good, spicy, but really good. It fits perfectly, as it is gluten free, vegan (with vegan sour cream) and of course no coffee or sugar. I did clean the kitchen up today and dishes are finishing running in the dishwasher, so as soon as that's done I'll be able to make up the coffee for the enemas. I also bought a little bathroom heater from Target. The idea of laying half naked on the floor in the cold in the winter for 30+ minutes while doing enemas, not too fun. Plus, don't you just hate having a nice steamy shower, then stepping out into the blistering cold. So I thought I little heater would be perfect. Tomorrow I'll have my coffee solution and the heater so enemas, here we go!
My goals for the weekend include:
Starting the coffee enemas 1-2 times daily
Bouncing on the trampoline in 5 minute increments and working my way up.
Work on getting 2 quarts of smoothie in
Declutter my kitchen and living room tables and go through my bills
Wash sheets
Meditate. Actually, I had been doing this with the enemas. You are supposed to hold the coffee enema for 15 minutes, so I have been doing Gabby's Spirit Junkie meditations to keep me relaxed and make it easier. I will continue to do that.
Otherwise, taking it one step at a time. Just have to work through some cravings, which amazing have more to do with pasta/pizza than chocolate. I really haven't had a lot of issues in that department. I've been drinking orange juice and that seems to take care of any possible sweet cravings.
Here is my Mom's White Bean Chili Recipe:
Ingredients:
1 onion, 1 minced garlic, 1/2 chopped yellow bell pepper (I used a whole one), 3 cans great northern beans, 2 cups veggie broth (I used water b/c veggie broth makes me vomit), 2 cans chopped green chili's, 1/2 bag frozen corn, 2/3 cup rice, 1 cup sour cream (I used vegan), both regular and white bean chili seasonings
Saute onion, garlic and yellow pepper in oil. Add rest except sour cream. Note: If you are using regular rice, add it here, if you use minute rice, wait until about 15 minutes before chili is done. Simmer for about 1 1/2 hours, stirring occasionally. Remove from heat and stir in sour cream. You may garnish with cilantro or cheese if you wish.
The Law of Attractionis responding to your thought, not to
your current reality. When you change the thought, your reality must
follow suit. If things are going well for you, then focusing upon what is
happening now will cause the well-being to continue, but if there are
things happening now that are not pleasing, you must find a way of taking
your attention away from those unwanted things. You have the ability to quickly change your patterns of thought, and
eventually… your life experience. Take 15 minutes daily, thinking of pleasant scenarios regarding your
body, with the sole intent of enjoying your body and appreciating its
strength and stamina and flexibility and beauty. When you visualize for
the joy of visualizing rather than with the intention of correcting some
deficiency, your thoughts are more pure and, therefore, more powerful.
When you visualize to overcome something that is wrong, your thoughts are
diluted with the "lackful" side of the equation. In time, your
physical condition will acquiesce to your dominant thoughts.
--- Abraham
At the beginning of the year, I created a list of intentions for 2011. We are a little more than half way through the year, so I thought it was time to check in on my goals.
I intend to create a daily practice of yoga, meditation and journaling
I intend to drink at least one Green Smoothie daily
I intend to do 35 minutes or more of cardio exercise at least 4 times a week, this includes dog walking, rebounder, etc.
I intend to focus on growing my blog this year, including number of followers, investing in SEO program, creating regular posts and updating the look
I intend to write and publish my first book
I intend to focus on my Spiritual practice, which could include taking classes at the Rime Buddhist Center, increasing my meditation practice, Spiritual reading, prayer, and creating my own Sacred Space.
I intend to start the year with a 21 Day Adventure Cleanse, and do mini-cleanses throughout the year
I intend to continue to build and grow my friendships and schedule at least one social outing each week
I intend to attend a Vipssanna meditation retreat as part of my healing and Spiritual growth
I intend to take a vacation this year, location TBA
My Success:
I drink green smoothies almost everyday, and really enjoy it. I attending a Spiritual retreat called Spirit Junkie, started A Course in Miracles, and have been learning to be more Spiritual. I blogged about my 21 Day Adventure Cleanse experience. I have made several new friends, made an effort to get social at least once a week, and have done fun things like the Roller Derby, chit-chat at a local coffee shop, and going out to the movies. Read here about my Vipssanna Meditation experience. I took a vacation to Portland, you can read my blog post here.
In progress:
I started off the year on a good path regarding Yoga and exercise, but sadly my health has taken a turn lately and prevented me from doing so. Hopefully as I build up my strength again, I can start small by rebounding. I also have not been very diligent about journaling, although I've done it a bit, and I've only recently increased my meditation practice. I will continue to focus on these two things. I have not had the mental clarity to focus on a book, so this may roll-over to 2012, once I am healed.
Overall I think I'm on the right track. How are your 2011 Intentions going?
My guru and friend Gabby Bernstein has recently released a meditation CD. I downloaded it a few weeks ago, prior to my Kripalu Spirit Junkie Adventure. These 12 tracks are fairly short, 6-10 minutes long, which is great for people who claim they have little time to meditate. So far I think that "The Bridge" and "Spirit Junkie" are my favorite meditations. I admit that my Ego has prevented me from taking the time to do the "Forgiveness" and "Cord-Cutting" meditations. My goal for this next week is to work on a least one Forgiveness letter, and do the meditations to release, then burn the letter and send it to the Universe. This is such a powerful technique, one which I've done before, and I believe the meditations will be a great aid. I highly recommend downloading her new album and get your meditation on!
Chapter One: Honoring Yourself Meditation
Witnessing Meditation
De-Special Meditation
Asking Meditation
Forgiveness Meditation
Relationship Meditation
Great Rays Meditation
Accepting Your Invitation
The Bridge Meditation
Releasing Meditation
Cord-Cutting Meditation
Spirit Junkie Meditation
Coming in September is her new book, Spirit Junkie! I am so excited! This will be a great follow up to her first book, Add More ~Ing to Your Life: A Hip Guide to Happiness. Part memoir, part guide, Spirit Junkie is a must have. Pre-order from Amazon today!
Check out my other blogs on Gabrielle Bernstein here.
Have you read anything by Gabby? Do you meditate? What are your favorite meditations?
Read "Good Omens" by Terry Prachett and Neil Gaiman
Get out your markers and create your vacation vision board. Post pictures of your fantasy destination, write mini-paragraphs of what you did, and post it where you can look at it daily
This past weekend I went to a beautiful yoga and health resort in the Berkshires of Massachusetts called Kripalu. I went to see ~ing diva Gabrielle Bernstein. I had applied for a scholarship earlier this summer, and low and behold, they selected me! My seminar and room and board were paid in full, and Gabby even helped with the flight. Now, if you've been following along, just two weeks ago I was told to prepare for hospice care, I could barely move, my body was shutting down, etc. So how on earth did I have the energy to maneuver my way through four airports and a large resort? Willpower baby! Since my Cancer Update post, I've started a new program (which I describe here) that has given me energy, more strength, and better breathing ability. I also knew that I NEEDED this experience. Part of my challenge with healing myself is that there has always been this little piece (ok, so it was GIANT in the beginning) that wants to die. I needed this experience to help motivate me and eliminate that piece. Right before I left, my Mom and her friend Kelly brought over a beautiful shaman named Rainbow Moon who helped me shift that piece. I resisted like crazy at first, but we did some powerful work, learning to connect and identify with the inner spirit self (a major theme to this workshop) and to silence the ego. The persona I created for my Spirit is a cross between Xena Warrior Princess and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She's a kick ass courageous warrior goddess who loves life and is a powerful healer. My Ego, computer dork. Who do you think is going to win in a showdown? Shanna Warrior Princess that's who!
So I had this understanding of my ~ing and Ego before going to the workshop. The workshop was called "Spirit Junkie" partially in honor of Gabby's new book out next month. She also recently released a Spirit Junkie meditation album, which has some great, and short, meditations. You can download from her site here. Anyway, I had an amazing weekend. We had orientation with a Q&A on Friday night, workshop most of Saturday, with time for other activities such as yoga, swimming, hiking (none of which I did) for those that could. I spent my free time journaling. Sunday morning we did a lot of group prayer, danced things out, and learned how to pass the lessons on to others. I met so many beautiful people who I hope to develop even stronger relationships with.
Some of the lessons I took from this experience:
The ~Ing and the Ego. Learn to recognize when your Ego is giving you shit, feel it, then let your ~ing guide you to a better place. Your Ego is the one that tells you that you can't do something, you are ugly, things are not going to work out, etc. Your ~ing supports your decisions, lets you know what a beautiful person you are. Which voice would you rather listen to? Remember, the computer dork is never going to be stronger than the Warrior Goddess.
De-Special Relationships. Sometimes we make someone more important than us. It could be a boyfriend, your kids, a celebrity. Remember, we are all one, all equal. No one is better than you, and you are not better than anyone else. If you are making someone more special than you, sit down and find out why? Then find that strength in yourself. And realize that we are all human, with human limitations, even the most perfect seeming people have their issues and imperfections. You are a beautiful spirit; don't forget that.
The F-Word. Forgiveness is such an important topic. I blogged about it previously here. I learned this weekend though that forgiveness is an ongoing process. There are always new issues that come up. Gabby has a great forgiveness meditation. I recommend writing a letter to the person or situation you need to forgive. Get nasty, let it all out. Then, finish the letter by forgiving the person/situation. I would then do the Forgiveness meditation from Gabby's Spirit Junkie Meditation CD, and then the Cord-Cutting Meditation. I suggest cord-cutting, because even after forgiving, we can still be "attached" to that person. This cuts any negative binds. Then, I would burn the letter and send the ashes off into the Universe. Forgiveness is the first step in any form of healing and growth.
Overall, an incredible experience. I am re-motivated to work on my Ego and ~Ing, and now I have a posse of Spirit Junkie ladies to aid me with this. I am grateful to have had this experience and look forward to my continued growth and emotional, physical, and spiritual healing.
Imagine going skiing for the very first time, and instead of taking a class and trying out the bunny slopes, you went to the black slopes, chose the most difficult, and jumped off the side of the mountain, praying you made it down in one piece. That is how Vipassana felt to me. Check out my original post Why Vipassana Meditation Made It On My 2011 Intentions to see why I went in the first place. Needless to say, not the experience I anticipated.
The experience is 10 days, in a remote retreat. You take a vow of silence, which also means no eye contact with your fellow students. The morning bell rings at 4am, with approximately 10 hours of meditation scheduled during the day, half mandatory in the hall, a few hours on your own in your room, and the rest up to the teachers discretion. Meals are served at 6:30am and 11am, simple vegetarian meals. Tea is at 5pm, and in the evening we watch a video created by one of the original teachers of the method. All that I took in well. Granted, it takes awhile to adjust to the sleep schedule and no dinner, but it gets easier. The silence is actually very peaceful. The only time I found it challenging was in those basic social situations, such as bumping into someone and wanting to say "Pardon Me". I had a lady elbow me hard in the head, and you could tell she automatically wanted to apologize, but since she couldn't look at me or speak to me, she scuttled off as quickly as possible.
The meditation itself got to me. Most boring experience of my entire life. I knew Buddhist meditations were simple, most focus on breathing, some do have visualization, and I knew this would be very simple, HOWEVER, I did not expect to spend 3.5 days FOCUSING ON MY NOSTRILS! Yes, my friends, the secret to gaining clarity in meditation and the first step on the path to enlightenment is to spend approximately 40 hours in 3 days focusing on the small triangle area of your nose. Observe, observe, observe.....for hours, and hours, and hours....yes, I went nuts. Day 4 in the afternoon we learned the actual technique of Vipssana, which basically you do the same thing, working your way through every single part of your body, for the next six days, approximately 65 hours of mediation. I expressed my desire to leave that night and was on the train to Portland the next morning. I knew it would be challenging, and I discovered I was not the first to leave, but I really wasn't prepared. Bunny slopes, bunny slopes.
I have the utmost respect for those who continue the program, and repeat it many times. I hope to one day be in that place and have a better appreciation for it. On a positive note, the establishment was in view of the mountains and had a lovely walking area we spent about an hour in everyday. Deer would come up to the dorm rooms, and one day the kitchen made the most delicious chocolate banana cake squares (which I snuck extra, yum!). The people were friendly and really kind when I chose to leave. Definitely a unique experience.
Do You Meditate? What Forms? Have You Ever Experience Vipssana or Thought About It?
Manifesting with the Universe takes faith and a knowing that your desires will be answered. However, we often block ourselves with doubt, and confuse wishing for something, with knowing that you will receive it. In Gabriel Bernstein's book Add More ~Ing to Your Life: A Hip Guide to Happiness, she shares with us her tools for getting in touch with the Universe. First, pray or send your request to the Universe (God, Goddess, Buddha, Jesus, etc.). Let it go. Know, that the Universe will provide. Then listen for the signs. Meditation helps with this. Through meditation you can visualize your request, feel the feeling of having your prayer answered, then be silent, and listen to the voice of the Universe. The Universe always has our back, we just don't always pay attention.
The key is to not attempt to control the path you may have to take to reach your outcome. If you are controlling the situation, you are not allowing the Universe to help you. Gabby has a few suggestions on strengthening your prayers. Create a "belief box", put your prayers in it as a sign that you are letting them go. Create an attitude of Gratitude. By recognizing the amazing things we already have, it puts us in alignment to attract new desires to us. Pray for others. Send your love to the people in your life, world crisis such as Japan, etc. The more you give, the more you will receive. The more you practice these tools, the more you will reap and soon you will know that the Universe has your back.
Cheryl Richardson's book The Unmistakable Touch of Grace touches on this as well. She includes a prayer to the Universe in her book. I recently used it to ask for guidance on healing my body completely, all physical aspects, and after a few moments of meditation, I heard a voice in my head provide me with a list of tools. I must say that if I had just sat down and written a list, this would not have been the list. The list contained almost 50 items, all of which I've been guided to do simultaneously and immediately. The Universe also told me that I am on the last leg of this journey, I simple need to focus.
Set time aside each day to send your prayer requests to the Universe and meditate for at least 15 minutes. You will feel a difference almost immediately. Peace, joy and loving support are worth 20 minutes of your day, don't you think?
A few weeks ago I posted an exercise from this amazing book, Embark on a Spiritual Journey. I explored the roots of Grace in my life, and where I am now. I've been reading this book and continuing the exercises and am amazing at how moved I am by the stories she's shared. This book provides tools on your spiritual journey, stories to inspired, examples of grace and much more.
Cheryl starts by asking us to be open to Grace, and provides a beautiful prayer to remind us to open ourselves. She also encourages us to ask ourselves several questions, including "How might you be blocking grace? What are you doing to control the situation?" As the book continues, she helps us look at the people in our life as "Spiritual Change Agents", a beautiful concept that really moved me. There is also a great tool for asking questions of your higher power, whether it be God, Buddha, The Universe, etc. I personally used this tool to get a guided list of healing tools I would need to completely heal my body.
In addition, she provides a list at the end of each chapter of suggested readings, meditations, etc. I have enjoyed her work, and previously wrote about another book of her's, The Extreme Art of Self-Care. If you are looking to expand your Spiritual life, this is a great book to get started with.
81. Take yourself on a date
82. Use coconut oil on your skin after showering
83. Stand naked in the mirror and tell each and every body part, organ, cell "I Love You"
84. Cut out carbs for a week
85. Cut out processed foods permanently
86. Eliminate soda pop from your diet
87. Take the "No TV for 30 Days" challenge
88. Take time to feel your feelings
89. Go to the Farmer's Market
90. Go on a Media Diet
91. Learn how to say "NO" with grace
92. Do some Spiritual House Cleaning
93. Drink lots of water
94. Take Probiotics
95. Chew your meals mindfully
96. Give yourself hugs
97. Practice visualization techniques
98. Stretch every morning when you get up
99. Learn the Tibetan Rejuvenation Rites
100. Love Yourself
