Wednesday, October 6, 2010
"I've known travelers who...run away at the sight of the monster grinning out of the mirror at them. Other's appear to have seen something even more horrible, but had the courage to go through. What some saw was not so frightening, but it still cost everyone of them an inner struggle. Nothing I can say would apply to all. It's a different experience each time." -The Neverending Story by Michael Ende
Is there someone in your life that bugs the crap out of you, whose behavior gets under your skin? Often times people who bother us the most, are a mirror for something we don't love about ourselves. For example, I have this friend who I see a few times a year for a lunch date. For the most part, I enjoy spending time with him. He's intelligent, unique, curious, vegetarian, music lover, into philosophy, etc. However, I always end our bi-annual luncheons with the desire to strangle him. Why? There are a few aspects of his personality that really bug me. The main one being, this attitude he seems to have that he is so different, that no one could possibly understand him. He tries so hard to be different from everyone else that he struggles to really connect with anyone and often prefers to be alone.
How does this relate to me? As a child I prided myself on my differences; feminist, atheist, vegetarian, I read tarot cards on the playground, I've never chewed a stick of gum, been drunk, experimented with drugs, and as far as I know I am the only Shanna Sandmoen the world has ever seen. I thrived on my differences, and in reality maybe a part of myself still does. In looking at myself through him, I see that I might have used those differences as an excuse for why I didn't always connect with people and why I tended to have a new BFF every year of my life. I also realized that this is a cover for my own insecurities, and seeing this trait in someone else bugged me so much because it's an aspect of myself I do not love.
We all have experiences such as this, next time you encounter of think of that person that irritates you, look in the mirror. Meditate and let your inner guidance system lead you to the truth. By unveiling this trait in yourself, you can take the steps to heal this part of yourself, and accept and love yourself completely. Mirror exercises are very powerful, but like Atreyu on his quest, we don't always see what we think we are going to see.
Gabrielle Bernstein, in her book Add More ~Ing To Your Life: A Hip Guide to Happiness, states, "Mirrors don't just reflect the things we need to change. They also reflect the beauty within us. The beauty you see in the world is the beauty you see in yourself."
Take time this month to reflect on your relationships in the "mirror" and rethink some aspects of your self. You may release a blockage, that will allow to attract more abundance into your life, a new relationship, or a better relationship with yourself.
(Watch minutes 4-7 to see Atreyu face himself in the Mirror Gate)