New Health Plan, Life at Mom's, More Spiritual Lessons

Fun card from my friend Jocelyn, my friends have been WONDERFUL!!

I've been home, and when I say home, I mean my Mom's house, from the hospital for almost two weeks now. It's been an interesting transition because a) I'm not in my own home b) I haven't lived with another person in a decade c) It's been longer than that since I've lived with my Mom d) We've had Home Health Care people (nurses, physical therapist, occupational therapist, etc) in and out all week e) and my biggest accomplishment was I learned how to shower myself again (which I'm proud of).

My book stash

All in all, stressful, but BRILLIANT at the same time. Today is my 31st birthday and I'm so grateful for all the lessons I've learned this past year. I've been in the hospital three times; I spent the best weekend of my life at Kripalu with my mentor Gabrielle Bernstein and met my Spirit Junkie Sisters, who have supported me all the way. I also had the worst vacation of my life with my Spring trip to Oregon; dropped out of a Vipassana meditation retreat, got rained on at the beach, and lost in Portland. Visited the Harry Potter theme park, yipee! I suddenly have a new family; soon to be step Mom, 5 grown "brothers and sisters" and 2 young ones, and numerous uncles, aunts, etc. My Dad is happier than I've ever seen him. My cancer is dissolving and recent events provided me with a new Soul Sister. Overall, I am grateful and looking forward to homemade manicotti and some delicious chocolate cake concoction from  Eden Alley. I also hope to venture out once or twice this weekend; one to spent a lovey Sunday afternoon at a local ice cream parlour, Murray's with my new family. 

Delicious green smoothie, I call it the Kindness Smoothie (spinach, mint, cacao nibs, bee pollen, honey, banana, and a probiotic)

Having my Mom as a caretaker, I have a pretty dedicated health plan, which already is working. My blood pressure, which has been low for several months, is now normal. I can already do many things for myself that shock the physical/occupational therapists. One of the things on my list, CoQ10 has a testimonial from a guy who had an infraction rate (it's how much blood your heart is pumping through your veins) of 22% (mine is 20% and normal is 55-75%) and in six months went up to 50%! There are also similar stories of people doing this with something call Limu Juice, which has a special seaweed. In orange juice, it's not bad. I'm doing both, plus Hawthorn Berry for my heart. 

Written in a card by one of my Spirit Junkie Sisters

We've also started QiGong exercises, a Chinese technique that moves the Chi and has healed millions for the last thousand years or so. Very simple, slow exercises. I also have arm exercises to build up my strength and muscle and will be starting a simple yoga in the next week. I am also doing a healing technique called the Healing codes, which is similar to EFT in some ways, but more about shifting energy. I do it in combination to the Violet Flame, a healing prayer/meditation. 

Re-reading Spirit Junkie for the Wild Sisterhood book club

I'm excited to be healing, and look forward to having a fantastic birthday, and incredible summer at Kripalu. I also have done some writing, and have three pieces coming out in three different publications over the next month!! I will post more details when I have them. 

Also, don't forget I have two other blogs, Radical Self Love and Enlightened by Books. 

Gratitude and Love,

Shanna

Congestive Heart Failure: My Recently Discovered Disease

According to the Mayo clinic, heart failure  "means your heart can't pump enough blood to meet your body's needs. Over time, conditions such as narrowed arteries in your heart (coronary artery disease) or high blood pressure gradually leave your heart too weak or stiff to fill and pump efficiently."

Cardiologist measure the heart using what they call the "infraction rate". Essentially, the pumping potential of a healthy heart is 55-75%, mine is 20% (up from 15%!). Because of this, my heart can't keep up, hence the crazy fluid leakage. 


NOTE: I COULD NEVER HAVE HAD CANCER AND WOULD STILL HAVE DEVELOPED HEART FAILURE. THIS IS A COMPLETELY SEPARATE DISEASE I HAVE DEVELOPED!!


I say that for all the naysayers who will say now "if only she had done chemo" and shake their head. Well, if I had done chemo, I would be dead. My slowly deteriorating heart would surely have given out. And as far as cancer goes, my tumors continue to shrink and heal. 


So what now? I have started some heart herbs, CoQ10 and Hawthorn Berry. I am drinking 8oz Limu juice, a seaweed that has proven to heal heart failure. I am doing some emotional work with the Healing Codes and Violet Flame. I have incorporated QiGong in for exercise and some arm exercises to strengthen my body. We are continuing our previous healing, getting really focused. I alternate between a green smoothie and superfood smoothie. Items include E3 Alive, Colostrum, Missessence Radical Berry, Bee Pollen, Raw Honey and Marine Phytoplankton. I have also been drinking MSM and D-Ribose, great for rebuilding hair, nails, and healing skin. I spend time visualizing my healing, talking to my angels and doing meditations. A good night's sleep is helpful for anyone. I KNOW I will heal, and in four months I will be vacationing in the Berkshires of Massachussetts at Kripalu, hanging out with my Spirit Goddess Gabrielle Bernstein and all my Spirit Junkie Sisters at Gabby's Loveatarian Retreat. 

Photos: Pre-Cancer to Now

My body has transitioned so much these past eight years. It's gone from a Women's size 18 to emancipated. Pictures speak volumes, and I want to share with you how my body has changed. Saying that, in a few months, when my arms gain muscle, my hair regrows, and I get my sexy back on, I'll show you those as well. ;)

This is the beginning, right around diagnosis time. Me at my heaviest. But good grief look at that beautiful hair!!

This is from 2006, about two years into my diagnosis. I would say I was a size 12-14 here. Look at my gorgeous hair!! Ok, not going to cry.

This is from 2009, I was getting quite skinny. Check me out in my skinny jeans!

Beginning of 2011. Still plenty of hair, but I notice now that my arms are starting to get pretty small.

When I saw this I cried. I didn't know who is was. I asked my Dad "who is that emancipated creature on my camera, where are the pictures we took of me?" It took me several minutes to realize, that IS me. These were taken just this week on the day I came home from the hospital. You can see the water weight bloating my stomach, but my god, my arms!! And my face! If you had a closer look you would see I've lost a great deal of hair, and am getting a bald spot. This is where I'm at now. 









As my heart heals, the liquid will release. As we start my arm exercises, fill me with TONS of nutrition, and heal my heart, My body will return. I would like to look like I did in 2009. I feel like it's my healthiest look. Next week I will explain Congestive Heart Failure, how I have developed a condition completely separate from cancer, what we're doing about it, and life at my Mom's house. This July I'm going to Kripalu for Gabby Bernstein's Loveatarian workshop, and I plan on having a lovely head of hair, strong arms, strong heart, and much smaller tummy.